{"title":"SUMMER SCENTS","description":"","products":[{"product_id":"soap-for-stoners","title":"Soap for Stoners","description":"\u003ch4\u003eIt's 4:20 somewhere...\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003eBlaze it! You don’t have to be in Colorado to get stoned; but it kinda helps when you don’t have to buy your grass from the sketchy high school D.A.R.E. officer like the rest of us. Best to keep this candle around for when the boys in blue show up. Its hypnotic shades of green and dank cannabis scent will provide the perfect cover for that weird smell in your apartment.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCannabis Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Cannabis Flower\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":31866250788941,"sku":"STO-S","price":12.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_SOAPS_9.6.23_WEB-14_930071a2-f82a-447a-8812-04ba9331c5fe.jpg?v=1770832147"},{"product_id":"soap-for-introverts","title":"Soap for Introverts","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003ePeople suck.\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003eThat’s why you prefer to stay inside with your vintage stuffed animal collection. But even enjoying your own company requires some ambiance. Ideally from this candle in a non-confrontational ocean blue.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eBlue Raspberry Jell-O Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Blue Raspberry Slushie\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":1095005660,"sku":"INT-S","price":12.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_SOAP_YELLOW_SMALLSQUARE-06.jpg?v=1770763013"},{"product_id":"a-candle-for-stoners","title":"A Candle for Stoners","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eIt's 4:20 somewhere...\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\" face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eBlaze it! You don’t have to be in Colorado to get stoned; but it kinda helps when you don’t have to buy your grass from the sketchy high school D.A.R.E. officer like the rest of us. Best to keep this candle around for when the boys in blue show up. Its hypnotic shades of green and dank cannabis scent will provide the perfect cover for that weird smell in your apartment.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCannabis Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Cannabis Flower\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":31866177257549,"sku":"STO-C","price":27.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_DUOCANDLES_TEAL_SMALLSQUARE-19.jpg?v=1770314363"},{"product_id":"a-candle-for-introverts","title":"A Candle for Introverts","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003ePeople suck.\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\" face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eThat’s why you prefer to stay inside with your vintage stuffed animal collection. But even enjoying your own company requires some ambiance. Ideally from this candle in a non-confrontational ocean blue.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eBlue Raspberry Jell-O Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Blue Raspberry Slushie\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":33208909070413,"sku":"INT-C","price":27.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_FAIREPHOTOS_10.3.23_SMALLSQUARE-06.jpg?v=1770228185"},{"product_id":"soap-for-zero-fucks","title":"Soap for Zero Fucks","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eNone to give.\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWe hear you. You're so over it you can't even. This newly-concocted bad attitude is just what the doctor ordered! Plus, none of us really liked it when you were just a simple, caring, average Joe. So kudos to you! Even though you couldn't give a F. We know. None to give.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCreamsicle Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Blood Orange, Vanilla\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":31769716041,"sku":"ZER-S","price":12.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_SOAP_BLUE_SMALLSQUARE-04.jpg?v=1770856833"},{"product_id":"a-candle-for-hangovers","title":"A Candle for Hangovers","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eWhy do I do this to myself?\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eThe pounding headache, the cold sweat, the I'm-totally-gonna-vom-on-my-way-to-work feeling... yeah, we're familiar with the good ol' fashioned hangover. I'm never drinking again. Well, except that this Friday is happy hour at my fave biker joint uptown, and I just got some brand spankin' new leather pants for the occasion. Okay, I'm never drinking again till the weekend starts. Maybe.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eBloody Mary Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Chili Pepper, Cucumber, Tomato Leaf\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":41916435849,"sku":"HAN-C","price":13.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_DUO_CANDLES_TEAL_SMALL_SQUARE-28.jpg?v=1723753525"},{"product_id":"soap-for-day-drinking","title":"Soap for Day Drinking","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eIt's ten a.m. somewhere.\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eHonestly, Saturdays were made for day drinking. And Sundays. And Fridays and Mondays and Thursdays. But don't feel guilty about it. It's exactly like going to brunch, except hold the chicken and waffles. You don't want all that heavy grease and gluten screwing with your buzz anyway.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eMojito Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Mojito, Peppermint\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42199851209,"sku":"DAY-S","price":12.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_SOAP_PURPLE_SMALLSQUARE_-05.jpg?v=1770754375"},{"product_id":"a-candle-for-day-drinking","title":"A Candle for Day Drinking","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product-description\" class=\"below\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"full_description\" class=\"rte\" itemprop=\"description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eIt's ten a.m. somewhere.\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eHonestly, Saturdays were made for day drinking. And Sundays. And Fridays and Mondays and Thursdays. But don't feel guilty about it. It's exactly like going to brunch, except hold the chicken and waffles. You don't want all that heavy grease and gluten screwing with your buzz anyway.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eMojito Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Mojito, Peppermint\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":33208851857485,"sku":"DAY-C","price":27.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_DUOCANDLES_TEAL_SMALLSQUARE-39.jpg?v=1770221840"},{"product_id":"a-candle-for-zero-fucks","title":"A Candle for Zero Fucks","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eNone to give.\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\" face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eWe hear you. You're so over it you can't even. This newly-concocted bad attitude is just what the doctor ordered! Plus, none of us really liked it when you were just a simple, caring, average Joe. So kudos to you! Even though you couldn't give a F. We know. None to give.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCreamsicle Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Blood Orange, Vanilla\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":33208941346893,"sku":"ZER-C","price":27.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_FAIREPHOTOS_10.3.23_SMALLSQUARE-15.jpg?v=1770745231"},{"product_id":"soap-for-dog-people","title":"Soap for Dog People","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eSmells like drool..\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBut you're used to that, right? In fact, if I had to guess I'd say your dog is probably sitting in the tub with you right now. Not that I blame you. My dog Charlie is tucked in bed with me right now. And we're wearing matching dog bone jammies.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eGrassy Dog Park Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Sweet Grass\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":5385229205533,"sku":"DOG-S","price":12.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_SOAPS_GREEN_SMALLSQUARE_-10.jpg?v=1770754998"},{"product_id":"soap-for-its-fine","title":"Soap for It's Fine","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eNo, really. It's fine.\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003eI'm totally not going to write anything for this soap. It's fine. I'm sure you're fine with that. Totally fine. I mean, you only offered me a glass of lukewarm tap water when I came to your party. So it's fine. Not payback or anything. I'm fine.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003ePlain Tap Water Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Ocean Mist\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":5385292316701,"sku":"ITF-S","price":12.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_SOAPS_GREEN_SMALLSQUARE_-14.jpg?v=1770763322"},{"product_id":"a-candle-for-dog-people","title":"A Candle for Dog People","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eSmells like drool..\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBut you're used to that, right? In fact, if I had to guess I'd say your dog is probably sitting in the tub with you right now. Not that I blame you. My dog Charlie is tucked in bed with me right now. And we're wearing matching dog bone jammies.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eGrassy Dog Park Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Sweet Grass\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":5914076643357,"sku":"DOG-C","price":27.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_FAIREPHOTOS_10.3.23_SMALLSQUARE-03.jpg?v=1770222109"},{"product_id":"a-candle-for-its-fine","title":"A Candle for It's Fine","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eNo, really. It's fine.\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\" face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eI'm totally not going to write anything for this soap. It's fine. I'm sure you're fine with that. Totally fine. I mean, you only offered me a glass of lukewarm tap water when I came to your party. So it's fine. Not payback or anything. I'm fine.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003ePlain Tap Water Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Ocean Mist\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":12578406465613,"sku":"ITF-C","price":27.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_FAIREPHOTOS_10.3.23_SMALLSQUARE-13.jpg?v=1770228279"},{"product_id":"a-candle-for-drinking-buddies","title":"A Candle for Drinking Buddies","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eMeet me after work?\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eHaha. Like I have to ask. I'll see you at 5:01 p.m. on our usual stools at our usual spot with our usual drinks. There's such comfort in rituals. Speaking of rituals, I'm in the bathroom right now Snapchatting you on my fourth break of the day. Only two more breaks and it's five! Cya soon!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDos Margaritas Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Frozen Margarita\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":33208854184013,"sku":"DRI-C","price":13.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_DUOCANDLES_TEAL_SMALLSQUARE-34.jpg?v=1770222414"},{"product_id":"a-candle-for-i-fucking-love-you","title":"I Fucking Love You Candle","description":"\u003ch4\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSmells like, I mean, probably\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003ePomegranate Champagne Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Champagne Pomegranate\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":21073945559117,"sku":"WT2-C","price":20.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_WTFCANDLES_BROWN_SMALLSQUARE_WT2-C.jpg?v=1771630028"},{"product_id":"a-candle-for-what-the-actual-fuck","title":"What The Actual Fuck Candle","description":"\u003ch4\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSmells like an existential crisis\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eCucumber-Aloe Daiquiri Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Aloe \u0026amp; Cucumber\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":21095111753805,"sku":"WT4-C","price":20.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_WTFCANDLES_BROWN_SMALLSQUARE_WT4-C.jpg?v=1771630727"},{"product_id":"a-candle-for-salty-bitches","title":"A Candle for Salty As Fuck","description":"\u003ch4\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eI like my beaches salty\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eSalty Dog Cocktail Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Grapefruit Mango\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":21095137116237,"sku":"WT6-C","price":20.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_FAIRE_WTFCANDLES_BROWN_SQUARE-5.jpg?v=1771624570"},{"product_id":"soap-for-a-new-home","title":"Soap for A New Home","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eMmmmmm...\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSmell that? Yeah, nothing except maybe clean paint and a hint of chocolate chip cookie air freshener. No cat pee, spoiled milk, or the unmistakable stench of sadness. So huff on that baggage-free lifestyle for as long as you can because you’ll be back to wallowing in your own filth soon. New homes are only new for so long.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eTrendy Terrarium Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Fresh Bamboo, Sweet Grass\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":28399698870349,"sku":"ANE-S","price":12.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_SOAPS_GREEN_SMALLSQUARE_-05.jpg?v=1770747865"},{"product_id":"a-candle-for-a-new-home","title":"A Candle for A New Home","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eMmmmmm...\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eSmell that? Yeah, nothing except maybe clean paint and a hint of chocolate chip cookie air freshener. No cat pee, spoiled milk, or the unmistakable stench of sadness. So huff on that baggage-free lifestyle for as long as you can because you’ll be back to wallowing in your own filth soon. New homes are only new for so long.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eTrendy Terrarium Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Fresh Bamboo, Sweet Grass\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":33208827674701,"sku":"ANE-C","price":27.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_FAIRE_PHOTOS_10.3.23_SMALL_SQUARE-08.jpg?v=1723750484"},{"product_id":"soap-for-calm-the-f-down","title":"Soap for Calm the F Down","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eCalm down.\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSo what if the world is going to hell in a hand basket? It’s like, yoga time. Meditation hour starts now. So pop in those AirPods, crank up the sounds of the rainforest, and reeelaaaax. The Zoom rager starts in two hours and I expect you keg-stand ready!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eRain Stick Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Cool Clear Water, Ginger Ale\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":32927805866061,"sku":"CAL-S","price":12.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_SOAP_YELLOW_SMALLSQUARE-07.jpg?v=1770751926"},{"product_id":"soap-for-karens","title":"Soap for Karens","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eWho let \u003cem\u003eher\u003c\/em\u003e in here?\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\" face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003eDamn, we were all just minding our own businesses behind masks and politeness distances at Trader Joe's and in stormed THIS walking can of hair spray. She startled me so much I dropped my non-dairy oat beverage, which you know is vital to my health after that last bout with lactose intolerance at the skating rink. It's the question that keeps haunting us all. No really, who let her in here?\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eSpiky Hair Styling Mousse Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Champagne Pomegranate, Grapefruit Mango\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":32927813042253,"sku":"KRN-S","price":12.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_SOAP_YELLOW_SMALLSQUARE-15.jpg?v=1770765735"},{"product_id":"a-candle-for-calm-the-f-down","title":"A Candle for Calm the F Down","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eCalm down.\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eSo what if the world is going to hell in a hand basket? It’s like, yoga time. Meditation hour starts now. So pop in those AirPods, crank up the sounds of the rainforest, and reeelaaaax. The Zoom rager starts in two hours and I expect you keg-stand ready!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eRain Stick Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Cool Clear Water, Ginger Ale\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":33208846417997,"sku":"CAL-C","price":27.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_FAIREPHOTOS_10.3.23_SMALLSQUARE-21.jpg?v=1770220157"},{"product_id":"a-candle-for-karens","title":"A Candle for Karens","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eWho let \u003cem\u003eher\u003c\/em\u003e in here?\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\" face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eDamn, we were all just minding our own businesses behind masks and politeness distances at Trader Joe's and in stormed THIS walking can of hair spray. She startled me so much I dropped my non-dairy oat beverage, which you know is vital to my health after that last bout with lactose intolerance at the skating rink. It's the question that keeps haunting us all. No really, who let her in here?\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eSpiky Hair Styling Mousse Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Champagne Pomegranate, Grapefruit Mango\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":33208910970957,"sku":"KRN-C","price":27.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_FAIREPHOTOS_10.3.23_SMALLSQUARE-05.jpg?v=1770228460"},{"product_id":"a-candle-for-fuck-that","title":"Fuck That Candle","description":"\u003ch4\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSmells like time's up\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eSloe Gin Fizz Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Agave Lime, Gin Martini, Lemon\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":32927848693837,"sku":"WT7-C","price":20.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_WTFCANDLES_BROWN_SMALLSQUARE_WT7-C.jpg?v=1771628814"},{"product_id":"bad-vibes-emergency-ambiance-travel-tin","title":"Bad Vibes Emergency Ambiance Travel Tin","description":"\u003ch4\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eHerbal Tea Scented\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eFragrance: Green Tea \u0026amp; Cucumber\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":32927850758221,"sku":"BAD-T","price":7.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_FAIREPHOTOS_10.6.23_SMALLSQUARE-02.jpg?v=1771515731"},{"product_id":"because-children-emergency-ambiance-travel-tin","title":"Because Children Emergency Ambiance Travel Tin","description":"\u003ch4\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eWine Popsicles Scented\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eFragrance: Cucumber Mint, Merlot\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":32927866159181,"sku":"BEC-T","price":14.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_FAIREPHOTOS_10.6.23_SMALLSQUARE-10.jpg?v=1771515936"},{"product_id":"fucking-meetings-emergency-ambiance-travel-tin","title":"Fuck This Meeting Emergency Ambiance Travel Tin","description":"\u003ch4\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eSour Grapefruit Scented\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eFragrance: Camay Soap, Lemon Lime \u0026amp; Fresh Basil\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":32927870484557,"sku":"MEE-T","price":14.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_FAIREPHOTOS_10.6.23_SMALLSQUARE-01.jpg?v=1771517434"},{"product_id":"i-miss-my-dog-emergency-ambiance-travel-tin","title":"I Miss My Dog Emergency Ambiance Travel Tin","description":"\u003ch4\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eCucumber Melon Scented\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eFragrance: Basil Sage Mint, Cucumber Melon\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":32927871107149,"sku":"DOG-T","price":14.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_FAIREPHOTOS_10.6.23_SMALLSQUARE-15.jpg?v=1771517937"},{"product_id":"someone-coughed-emergency-ambiance-travel-tin","title":"Someone Coughed Emergency Ambiance Travel Tin","description":"\u003ch4\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eFresh Clean Hands Scented\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eFragrance: Camay Soap, Lemon Lime Fresh Basil\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":32927885492301,"sku":"COU-T","price":7.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/products\/Lifestyle_EA_SomeoneCoughed2copy.jpg?v=1763757645"},{"product_id":"a-candle-for-outdoor-people-1","title":"A Candle for Outdoor People","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eSunsets just \u003cem\u003eget\u003c\/em\u003e me.\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\" face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eIf I'm inside, you can bet I'm thinking of being out. I'm just never more comfortable than when I'm knee-deep in swamps, poison ivy, and cicadas. In fact, I once knitted an entire sweater out of coyote fur and campfire smoke. If you don't believe me, check my Insta pics. I'm the one with the fierce abs, trail mix, and year-round suntan.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eSummer Camp Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Brimstone, Planting Soil, Sweet Grass, Sweet Peony\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":39363910008909,"sku":"OUT-C","price":13.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_DUO_CANDLES_SMALL_SQUARE-02.jpg?v=1730421963"},{"product_id":"copy-of-a-candle-for-indoor-people","title":"A Candle for Indoor People","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eBut it's \u003cem\u003eraining\u003c\/em\u003e...\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\" face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eSorry, I don't do rain. Or snow. Or heat. Unless it's the absolute most-perfect, bug-free day of they year, I'm staying in. And why not? I've got books, heat, AC, food, ice cold drinks, Netflix, social media, hot water, my BED, and my CAT. I'm good to go. I prefer staying in and trash-talking with my rubber duckie, thank you very much.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eBubble Bath Buds Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Banana, Fresh Peach, Vanilla\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":39363924230221,"sku":"IND-C","price":13.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_DUO_CANDLES_SMALL_SQUARE-15.jpg?v=1730421853"},{"product_id":"a-candle-for-the-cool-aunt","title":"A Candle for the Cool Aunt","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eHoney, hand me that bottle?\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\" face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eYour auntie needs another top-off. It's been a \u003cem style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eweek\u003c\/em\u003e, I tell ya. My work load is \u003cem style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eintense\u003c\/em\u003e and my dating life is an absolute \u003cem\u003etrain wreck\u003c\/em\u003e\u003ci style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e.\u003c\/i\u003e Honestly, coming over to see my favorite niece and nephew is giving me \u003cem style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003elife\u003c\/em\u003e right now. I don't know why your mom complains so much, you two are absolute angels. You know, she wasn't \u003cem\u003ealways\u003c\/em\u003e this strict. You should've \u003cem\u003eseen\u003c\/em\u003e her in high school, oh my lord, she used to...\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eJuicy Gossip Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Cantaloupe, Fresh Peach, Juicy Fruit\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":39363927081037,"sku":"AUN-C","price":27.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_DUOCANDLES_TEAL_SMALLSQUARE-25.jpg?v=1770315452"},{"product_id":"a-candle-for-the-fun-uncle","title":"A Candle for the Fun Uncle","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eBeer me!\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\" face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cem\u003eWhite 80, hut, hut, hike!\u003c\/em\u003e I still don't know what that means, but it's something my uncle would've said as he wrestled me and my brothers to the living room with a full beer in his paw while he simultaneously kept his eyes on the tv the whole time, stopping only to shout obscenities at the refs for \"cheating\" and being \"morons.\" Sure, someone always got injured in the end, but to be honest, rough-housing with the fun uncle was some of the best times we ever had.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eBlack Ice Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Blood Orange, Christmas Tree, Indian Sandalwood, Violet\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":39363927441485,"sku":"UNC-C","price":27.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_FAIREPHOTOS_10.3.23_SMALLSQUARE-07.jpg?v=1770740956"},{"product_id":"soap-for-the-fun-uncle","title":"Soap for the Fun Uncle","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eBeer me!\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003e\u003cem\u003eWhite 80, hut, hut, hike!\u003c\/em\u003e I still don't know what that means, but it's something my uncle would've said as he wrestled me and my brothers to the living room with a full beer in his paw while he simultaneously kept his eyes on the tv the whole time, stopping only to shout obscenities at the refs for \"cheating\" and being \"morons.\" Sure, someone always got injured in the end, but to be honest, rough-housing with the fun uncle was some of the best times we ever had.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eBlack Ice Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Blood Orange, Christmas Tree, Indian Sandalwood, Violet\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":39363932651597,"sku":"UNC-S","price":12.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_SOAPS_GREEN_SMALLSQUARE_-06.jpg?v=1770859041"},{"product_id":"soap-for-the-cool-aunt","title":"Soap for The Cool Aunt","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eHoney, hand me that bottle?\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003eYour auntie needs another top-off. It's been a \u003cem\u003eweek\u003c\/em\u003e, I tell ya. My work load is \u003cem\u003eintense\u003c\/em\u003e and my dating life is an absolute \u003cem\u003etrain wreck\u003c\/em\u003e\u003ci\u003e.\u003c\/i\u003e Honestly, coming over to see my favorite niece and nephew is giving me \u003cem\u003elife\u003c\/em\u003e right now. I don't know why your mom complains so much, you two are absolute angels. You know, she wasn't \u003cem\u003ealways\u003c\/em\u003e this strict. You should've \u003cem\u003eseen\u003c\/em\u003e her in high school, oh my lord, she used to...\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eJuicy Gossip Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Cantaloupe, Fresh Peach, Juicy Fruit\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":39363934781517,"sku":"AUN-S","price":12.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_SOAPS_GREEN_SMALLSQUARE_-04.jpg?v=1770857757"},{"product_id":"emergency-ambiance-travel-tin-for-rude-people","title":"Rude People Emergency Ambiance Travel Tin","description":"\u003ch4\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eSalty Caramel Scented\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eFragrance: Caramel, Grapefruit, Wood Sage \u0026amp; Sea Salt\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":39363970924621,"sku":"RUD-T","price":7.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_FAIREPHOTOS_10.6.23_SMALLSQUARE-19.jpg?v=1771519485"},{"product_id":"out-of-vodka-emergency-ambiance-travel-tin-new","title":"Out of Vodka Emergency Ambiance Travel Tin","description":"\u003ch4\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eEmpty Bottle Blues Scented\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eFragrance: Ocean Mist, Isla De Elba, Yuzu\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":39363986260045,"sku":"OUT-T","price":14.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_FAIREPHOTOS_10.6.23_SMALLSQUARE-16.jpg?v=1771518860"},{"product_id":"sunday-scaries-emergency-ambiance-travel-tin","title":"Sunday Scaries Emergency Ambiance Travel Tin","description":"\u003ch4\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eBottomless Mimosas Scented\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eFragrance: Blood Orange, Champagne Pear\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":39363987603533,"sku":"SUN-T","price":7.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_FAIREPHOTOS_10.6.23_SMALLSQUARE-09.jpg?v=1771520170"},{"product_id":"let-that-shit-go-vintage-paint-can-dle","title":"Let That Shit Go Vintage Paint Can·dle","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003e\n\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eIt's time.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" mce-data-marked=\"1\" data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\n\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eSweet Release Scented\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eFragrance: Cucumber, Mint, Vanilla\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":39363990913101,"sku":"PAI-6","price":26.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_PAINTCANS_DINERVINYL_SMALLSQUARE_PAI-6.jpg?v=1771608499"},{"product_id":"whoop-ass-vintage-paint-can-dle","title":"Whoop Ass Vintage Paint Can·dle","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003e\n\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eOpen if you dare.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" mce-data-marked=\"1\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\n\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eSucker Punch Scented\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eFragrance: Lemon, Coconut\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":39363990978637,"sku":"PAI-8","price":26.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_PAINTCANS_DINERVINYL_SMALLSQUARE_PAI-8.jpg?v=1771609037"},{"product_id":"dog-people-air-freshener","title":"Dog People Air Freshener","description":"\u003ch4\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eGrassy Dog Park Scented\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-fragment=\"1\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eKnow what stinks? Not you! Now that you have your very own candle air freshener to haul around with you, people will quit pinching their noses and running for the hills. Hopefully. You still have to occasionally bathe, you know.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":39364042424397,"sku":"DOG-F","price":7.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_NEW_DUO_AF_SMALL_SQUARE-21.jpg?v=1730422798"},{"product_id":"gee-whiz-anti-cursing-paint-can-candle","title":"Gee Whiz Anti-Cursing Paint Can Candle","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003cmeta charset=\"UTF-8\"\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eGee Whiz\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\" style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" mce-data-marked=\"1\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eDon’t you think people are just cursing too much these days? With all the F-bombs and r-words and see you next Tuesdays flying around everywhere, it’s hard to get a word in edgewise. So take the easy way out: buy this candle and shut the fuck up. Thanks!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eOff-Brand Boxed Wine Scented\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eFragrance: Blood Orange, Fresh Peach, Red Delicious Apple\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42478624112886,"sku":"ACC-WHIZ","price":26.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_PAINTCANS_DINERVINYL_SMALLSQUARE_ACC-WHIZ.jpg?v=1771609532"},{"product_id":"gosh-darnit-anti-cursing-paint-can-candle","title":"Gosh Darnit Anti-Cursing Candle","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cmeta charset=\"UTF-8\"\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003e\n\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eYou fucking kids and your fucking dirt bikes.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" mce-data-marked=\"1\" data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\n\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" mce-data-marked=\"1\" data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003eGet off my lawn! You can all go burn in hell you little shits. Hope you have fun in juvie. And oh yeah, the Roundup is a fucking carcinogen.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eSilent Spring Scented\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003eFragrance: Potting Soil, Sweet Grass\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42478632829174,"sku":"ACC-GOSH","price":26.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_PAINTCANS_DINERVINYL_SMALLSQUARE_ACC-GOSH.jpg?v=1771609727"},{"product_id":"outdoor-people-air-freshener","title":"Outdoor People Air Freshener","description":"\u003ch4\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: #000000;\" data-mce-style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\" data-mce-style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eSunsets just \u003cem\u003eget\u003c\/em\u003e me.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-fragment=\"1\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003eIf I'm inside, you can bet I'm thinking of being out. I'm just never more comfortable than when I'm knee-deep in swamps, poison ivy, and cicadas. In fact, I once knitted an entire sweater out of coyote fur and campfire smoke. If you don't believe me, check my Insta pics. I'm the one with the fierce abs, trail mix, and year-round suntan.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eSummer Camp Scented\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42478720188662,"sku":"OUT-F","price":3.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_FAIRE_PHOTOS_9.23.23_SMALL_SQUARE-06.jpg?v=1770136701"},{"product_id":"i-fucking-love-you-wtf-air-freshener","title":"I Fucking Love You WTF Air Freshener","description":"\u003ch4\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: #000000;\" data-mce-style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\" data-mce-style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eSmells like, I mean, probably\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-fragment=\"1\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003eKnow what stinks? Not you! Now that you have your very own candle air freshener to haul around with you, people will quit pinching their noses and running for the hills. Hopefully. You still have to occasionally bathe, you know.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\" face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003ePomegranate Champagne Scented\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42478732017910,"sku":"WT2-F","price":7.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_FAIREPHOTOS_10.3.23_SMALLSQUARE-2.jpg?v=1770153530"},{"product_id":"what-the-actual-fuck-wtf-air-freshener","title":"What the Actual Fuck WTF Air Freshener","description":"\u003ch4\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: #000000;\" data-mce-style=\"color: #000000;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\" data-mce-style=\"caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0);\"\u003eSmells like an existential crisis\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-fragment=\"1\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003eKnow what stinks? Not you! Now that you have your very own candle air freshener to haul around with you, people will quit pinching their noses and running for the hills. Hopefully. You still have to occasionally bathe, you know.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\" face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003eCucumber-Aloe Daiquiri Scented\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42478736277750,"sku":"WT4-F","price":7.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_FAIREPHOTOS_9.23.23_SMALLSQUARE-42.jpg?v=1770154183"},{"product_id":"a-candle-for-thats-what-she-said","title":"A Candle for That's What She Said","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eWhy is this so hard?\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\" face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\"\u003eThat’s what she said! And who is she, you ask? The kinda person who has an office and a workspace, that's who. I mean, what kind of sociopath can create in the same place they conduct business? Hey, I know when \u003cem\u003eI\u003c\/em\u003e get frustrated, or irritated, or angry—I just smell all my soap and candles. And poof! It goes away, just like that. And that’s what she said.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eTwinkie Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Lemon Pound Cake\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42478899527926,"sku":"SHE-C","price":13.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_DUO_CANDLES_SMALL_SQUARE-13.jpg?v=1730422050"},{"product_id":"soap-for-crazy-bitches","title":"Soap for Crazy Bitches","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eDon't make me take my hoops out.\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eI'm literally on the verge of smacking that cheap face off your head. If you don't come with me right now to the club and down 14 shots of \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003eJäger\u003c\/span\u003e with me, I'm telling everyone about that night you spent passed out, face-down on the pavement outside the Sheetz drive-thru window, plain cheeseburger in hand.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eSalty Melons Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Cantaloupe, Sweet Orange Chili Pepper\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":44138967662838,"sku":"BIT-S","price":12.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_SOAP_YELLOW_SMALLSQUARE-08.jpg?v=1770753175"},{"product_id":"a-soap-for-fucking-zen","title":"Soap for Fucking Zen","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eOm.\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan face=\"verdana, geneva, sans-serif\" style=\"font-family: verdana, geneva, sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eI don't get it. I've been sitting here raking the litter box for the last two hours and I don't feel anything but annoyed, and frankly, a little nauseous. Whoever said zen gardens are meditative and spiritually healing never met my cat, Bill the Shitter. Yeah, I know. I could buy a \"real\" zen garden but that would cut into my beer money. And that shit ain't happening.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCool Cucumber Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Agave Lime, Cucumber Melon\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":44138973167862,"sku":"ZEN-S","price":12.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_SOAP_BLUE_SMALLSQUARE-16.jpg?v=1770759743"},{"product_id":"a-candle-for-bad-attitudes","title":"A Candle for Bad Attitudes","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"below\" id=\"product-description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"rte\" id=\"full_description\" itemprop=\"description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003eAre you still here?\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eI thought perhaps my lack of eye contact and general disinterest may have clued you in. But here you are, still standing in front of me with your half-baked motivational sound bites and cheesy grin. No, I'm not going to be a \"team player\" and be more \"pleasant to Tim\" and stop \"drinking on the job.\" What is this, a Cub Scout jamboree?\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eCynical Citrus Scented\u003cbr\u003eFragrance: Blood Orange, Pink Peppercorn\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":44147860504822,"sku":"ATT-C","price":13.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0742\/1555\/files\/WRS_DUO_CANDLES_TEAL_SMALL_SQUARE.jpg?v=1770218460"}],"url":"https:\/\/www.whiskeyriversoap.com\/collections\/summer-scents.oembed?page=2","provider":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","version":"1.0","type":"link"}